2010年11月30日星期二

骂人宝典续集(中文版)

请看骂人的最高境界:骂人不带脏字。
吓到了~~ 你是
  进化不完全的生命体,基因突变的外星人,
  幼稚园程度的高中生,先天蒙古症的青蛙头,
  圣母峰雪人的弃婴,化粪池堵塞的凶手,
  非洲人搞上黑*的后裔,阴阳失调的黑猩猩,
  被诺亚方舟压过的河马,新火山喷发口,
  超大无耻传声扩音喇叭,爱斯基摩人的耻辱,
  和蟑螂共存活的超个体,生命力腐烂的半植物,
  会发出臭味的垃圾人,“唾弃“名词的源头,
  每天退化三次的恐龙,人类历史上最强的废材,
  上帝失手摔下来的旧洗衣机,能思考的无脑袋生物,
  损毁亚洲同胞名声的祸害,祖先为之蒙羞的子孙,
  沉积千年的腐植质,科学家也不敢研究的原始物种,
  10倍石油浓度的沉积原料,被毁容的麦当劳叔叔,
 像你这种可恶的家伙 :
  只能演电视剧里的一陀粪,
  比不上路边被狗洒过尿的口香糖,
  连如花都帅你10倍以上,
  找女朋友得去动物园甚至要离开地球,
  想要自杀只会有人劝你不要留下尸体以免污染环境,
  你摸过的键盘上连阿米吧原虫都活不下去,
  喷出来的口水比SARS还致命,
  装可爱的话可以瞬间解决人口膨胀的问题,
  耍酷装帅的话人类就只得用无性生殖,
  白痴可以当你的老师,智障都可以教你说人话,
  只要你抬头臭氧层就会破洞
  要移民火星是为了要离开你,
  如果你的丑陋可以发电的话全世界的核电厂都可以停摆,
  去打仗的话子弹飞弹会忍不住向你飞,
  手榴弹看到你会自爆,
  别人要开飞机去撞双子星才行而你只要跳伞就有同样的威力,
  你去过的名胜全部变古迹,你去过的古迹会变成历史,
  18辈子都没干好事才会认识你,连丢进太阳都嫌不够环保
  反正横竖一句话:别让我再看见你,要是见着了你,
  我一定要把你灭了!

2010年11月29日星期一

骂人的最高境界~~转享

骂人的最高深境界是什么?


就是骂人却不带脏字。你能做到吗?
我们都是文明人,不要随便骂人,更不能象泼妇一样,叉着腰,一嘴脏话。但是有些人不骂不行。怎么办?请看骂人的最高境界:骂人不带脏字。(不要学这位弟弟哦~)———————

When Insults Had Class
骂人的艺术

“He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.”
–Winston Churchill
“他具有所有我不喜欢的美德和零个我所欣赏的恶习。”
——温斯顿·丘吉尔,英国传记作家、历史学家、政治家(1874-1965)

“I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure.”
–Clarence Darrow
“我从没杀过人,不过倒是欢欣鼓舞地读过不少讣告。”   
——克莱伦斯·丹诺,美国律师(1857-1938)

“He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary.”
–William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway)
“看他的作品,读者连字典都不用翻。”
——威廉·福克纳(评价欧尼斯特·海明威)


"Poor Faulkner. Does he really think big emotions come from big words?"
—Ernest Hemingway (about William Faulkner)
“可怜的福克纳。难道他认为“复杂的”感情一定要用“复杂的”字眼才能表达吗?”
——欧尼斯特·海明威(评价威廉·福克纳)

“I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn’t it.”
–Groucho Marx
“我享受过美妙的夜晚,但今晚不是。”
——格劳乔·马克斯

“I didn’t attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.”
–Mark Twain
“我没参加那场葬礼,但我写了封友好的信表示我支持它的举行。”
——马克·吐温,美国作家(l835-1910)


“He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.”
–Oscar Wilde
“他没有敌人,只不过他的朋友对他恨之入骨。”
——奥斯卡·王尔德,英国著名诗人、作家、戏剧家(1856-1900)

“I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend... if you have one.”
–George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill
“随信附寄两张我新剧首演的入场券,带上个朋友来看吧,如果你还有朋友的话。”
——萧伯纳致丘吉尔
(萧伯纳,英国现代杰出的现实主义戏剧作家,世界著名的擅长幽默与讽刺的语言大师)

“Cannot possibly attend first night; will attend second, if there is one.”
–Winston Churchill’s response to George Bernard Shaw
“可能无法出席首演;但我会来看第二场,如果还有第二场的话”
——温斯顿·丘吉尔回复乔治·萧伯纳


“I feel so miserable without you; it’s almost like having you here.”
–Stephen Bishop
“你不在身边,让我感觉好痛苦,感觉就像你在身边时一样。” 
——斯蒂芬·毕晓普,美国歌手(1951-)

“He is a self-made man and worships his creator.”
–John Bright
“他创造了自己,并且极其崇拜他的创造者。”
——约翰·布赖特,英国服装设计师
((用来打击自恋一族?))

“I’ve just learned about his illness. Let’s hope it’s nothing trivial.”
–Irvin S. Cobb
“我刚刚得知他的病情。让我们祝愿这千万不是小病。”
——欧文·S·科布,美国作家(1876-1994)

“He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others.”
–Samuel Johnson
“他不仅自己无趣;还能把无趣传染给别人。”
——塞缪尔·约翰逊,英国作家(1709-1784)

“He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up.”
–Paul Keating
“他随时能让你的脊背一阵哆嗦。”
——保罗·约翰·基廷,澳大利亚政治家(1944-)

“He had delusions of adequacy.”
–Walter Kerr
“他总有错觉,以为自己才高八斗。”
——沃尔特·克尔(美国作家,百老汇戏剧评论家)

“Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?”
–Mark Twain
“为什么你坐在那儿,看上去就像一个没写地址的信封?”
——马克·吐温
((是叫没人要吧?))

“His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork.”
–Mae West
“他老妈在鹳鸟送子的时候,应该把他扔了,把鹳鸟留下。”
——美国女演员、歌手、剧作家麦·韦斯特(1893-1980)
(西方人从前认为鹳鸟就是「送子鸟」,因为有些鹳鸟筑巢于烟囱上,并且年年都回到原来的巢穴,并且小孩相传就是从烟囱进入家庭的。)


“Winston, if you were my husband, I would poison your coffee!”
–Lady Astor to Winston Churchill at a dinner party
“温斯顿,你要是我的丈夫,我一定会在你的咖啡里下毒。”
——在一次晚宴中阿斯特夫人致温斯顿·丘吉尔,

“Madam, if I were your husband, I would drink it!”
–Winston Churchill’s response to Lady Astor
“夫人,我要是你的丈夫,我一定会把它喝下去的。”
——温斯顿·丘吉尔回应阿斯特夫人


"Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll waste no time reading it."
—Moses Hadas
“感谢您送我的大作样书,我不会浪费时间拜读的。”
——哥伦比亚学者莫塞斯·哈达斯(1900-1966)

"There's nothing wrong with you that reincarnation won't cure."
—Jack E. Leonard
“你什么毛病也没有,就算投胎转世也没得救。”    
——杰克·利昂纳多,好莱坞影星

"He has the attention span of a lightning bolt."
—Robert Redford
“他能集中起注意力的时间,如同闪电一样转瞬即逝。
—— 罗伯特·雷德福,好莱坞影星

"They never open their mouths without subtracting from the sum of human knowledge."
—Thomas Brackett Reed
“他们一张口,人类的知识就会受损失。”
——托马斯·布拉克特·里德(第36任及38任美国众议院发言人,绰号“Czar Reed”沙皇里德)评价两位同僚

"He inherited some good instincts from his Quaker forebears, but by diligent hard work, he overcame them."
—James Reston (about Richard Nixon)
“他从贵格会教徒的祖先那里继承到了一些优秀品质,但是通过刻苦努力,他克服了这些优点。”
——詹姆斯·赖斯顿(评价理查德·尼克松)
(贵格教要求人追求正直、诚实、完善)

"In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily."
—Charles, Count Talleyrand
“为了避免别人说自己是个爱调情的人,她总是很容易就顺从了。”
——查尔斯,塔列朗伯爵
      
"He loves nature in spite of what it did to him."
—Forrest Tucker
“他热爱自然,虽然自然待他刻薄。”
——美国演员福里斯特·塔克(1919-1986)

"He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any one I know."
—Abraham Lincoln
“他能最多的话语来阐述别人说过的最微不足道的观点。”
——亚伯拉罕·林肯

"He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts — for support rather than illumination."
—Andrew Lang (1844-1912)
“他利用统计数字,正如醉汉之利用电灯柱——非为借光,实为撑腰。”
——安德鲁·朗格(1844-1912),英国著名文学家、诗人、民俗学家、历史学家

"He has Van Gogh's ear for music." —Billy Wilder
“他有一只梵高的音乐之耳。”   
——好莱坞导演、制片人、编剧比利·怀尔德(1906-2002)
((梵高的耳朵被割掉了))

“Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.”
–Oscar Wilde
“有些人所到之处给别人带来欢乐,另一些人一旦离开就给别人带来欢乐。”
——奥斯卡·王尔德

"You, Mr. Wilkes, will die either of the pox or on the gallows."
–The Earl of Sandwich
“威尔克斯先生,将来你不是死于梅毒就是死在绞架上。”
——桑德维奇伯爵

"That depends, my lord, whether I embrace your mistress or your principles."
–John Wilkes's response to The Earl of Sandwich
“伯爵老爷,那得看我是抱着你的情妇还是抱着您的信条了。”
——约翰·威尔克斯回应桑德维奇伯爵

"A modest little person, with much to be modest about."
—Winston Churchill
“一个谦逊的小人物,身上有很多让他谦虚的东西。”
——丘吉尔(评价英国政治家克莱门特·艾德礼)

FashioN ----JIMMYCHOO

拿督周仰杰Choo Yeang Keat,英文名:Jimmy Choo,1961年),旅居英國倫敦的馬來西亞華人時尚設計師,籍贯客家,在1961年出生於槟城一個鞋匠世家。他在11歲時製作出了他生平的第一雙鞋。
在1988年,《時尚》史無前例地用了8頁版面介紹周仰杰的手工女裝鞋,讓周仰杰名聲大譟。1990年之後,周仰杰為黛安娜王妃製作了無數雙鞋子,知名度更加提升。
1996年,周仰杰與《時尚》雜誌編輯 Tamara Mellon 共同創立了 Jimmy Choo Ltd;開設精品鞋店,設計並銷售工廠量產的高檔女裝鞋子品牌 「Jimmy Choo London」。此後,「Jimmy Choo」品牌指的是「Jimmy Choo London」,而周仰杰原本的手工女裝鞋品牌便改成「Jimmy Choo Couture」。
2002年4月,周仰杰脫售了他手上所有的 Jimmy Choo Ltd 股份。從此周仰杰與 Jimmy Choo Ltd 完全脫離關係,繼續專心於他的超級高檔女裝鞋「Jimmy Choo Couture」。目前「Jimmy Choo Couture」鞋子是世界上最昂貴的鞋子;其擁護者包括各國王室、影視明星、政商名流等。
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连女神卡卡的歌都出现他的名字,应该听听吧^^
LADYGAGA~FASHION

2010年11月28日星期日

Daisuki Okonomiyaki~


++Okonomiyaki means "whatever you like, grilled in Japanese". It's one definition of "Japanese pizza" because, well, it does kinda look like pizza, and you eat it like one too.

Today we'll be making Osaka-style Okonomiyaki. It's also popular in Hiroshima, but it's a little harder to make and doesn't appear to pay off much more in the taste department!
++THESE ARE THE INGREDIENT YOU NEED++
Base:
1 cup flour
3/4 cup dashi (or water, see below)*
1 egg
1/8-1/4 of a cabbage

Toppings - any of the below:
Chicken
Roast pork or beef
Squid, Octopus, other seafood
Corn
Mushrooms
Onion

Garnishing - any of the below, if you can find it and actually want it:
Katsuo-bushi (dried bonito flakes)
Sakura-ebi (dried shrimps)
Beni-shoga (red ginger)
Ao-nori (green seaweed)

Sauces:
Okonomiyaki sauce (or tonkatsu sauce)
Mayonnaise

* Dashi is Japanese stock, used in heaps of different recipes. When made up it smells like smoked fish and seaweed. You can buy it from oriental grocers in sachets that come in boxes like the one to the right of the beer in the picture above. Just mix up a bit with some hot water. If you can't find it, it's okay - just use water.
there are the steps to cook:
1.firstly grab that cabbage and chop it up finely. Better to have too much than too little because it shrinks a little as it cooks, and it's mega cheap anyway. Get out as much of the white stem parts as you can.
Now break an egg into a large bowl and pour in the dashi/water, and the flour.
Then beat with a whisk until smooth.
add some of the finely chopped cabbage and mix as best you can. It should end up looking like this.
Heat up your skillet, electric fry pan, grill, whatever you're going to use to cook this baby. Preferably use something that's got teflon on it :-)
Now prepare your toppings. I'm using Chinese BBQ meat slices, a little bell pepper, some onion, mushrooms, parsley and spring onion. Just chop it all up good.
Throw it all in the fry pan with some oil (sesame is good) to keep it all well-lubed. Cook until either heated through or in the case of raw meat or veges, for a few minutes until it's getting close to being cooked.
Arrange the nearly cooked toppings in a round
Then throw the cabbage/dough mixture on top, also in a round!
Turn up the heat a little to medium and let that bad boy cook through for 5 minutes or so. Then flip it. In the picture below, I had to cut the round in half to flip it, which doesn't matter because we'll be cutting it into pieces later anyway. You could always make two okonomiyaki instead! Let it cook for another 5-10 minutes. You can break away a bit of the dough bit when it doesn't look raw any more and see if the cabbage and dough is cooked through.
Flip it out onto a plate and cover liberally with Okonomiyaki sauce and mayonnaise.
its time to serve ......

2010年11月27日星期六

台湾滨崎步--王彩樺




王彩桦(Lotus Wang,1969年11月24日-),台湾演员,常扮演谐星,跑遍谈话节目、综艺节目、游戏节目,什么内容都能聊,各种角色都难不倒她,因为工作敬业、努力完成各项任务、感恩前辈、亲近不耍大牌,加上在节目上不顾形象的表演,于2008年11月在台湾最多人的批踢踢实业坊(PTT BBS),王彩桦被封为“桦神”,与刘德华的“华神”并驾齐驱,其地位深植批踢踢实业坊的乡民心中。

王彩桦从小就帮忙赚钱养家,孝顺的王彩桦为了帮父亲还债、帮哥哥付学费、让奶奶看病,16岁就到舞厅唱歌,甚至跑过牛肉场,差点被警察抓走,一直到在歌舞厅遇见方骏,见她孝顺懂事,才被拉拔进入演艺圈,甚至到《猪哥亮的臭弹秀》客串演短剧,从此打开中南部的知名度。
已婚,两个孩子的妈,甚至早就过了被影迷崇拜的偶像年龄,王彩桦能够在演艺圈屹立不摇多年,声势有如倒吃甘蔗。
王彩桦也出了一本书名为"B咖人生"
里头介绍了她本人的黄金B咖方程式

以下影片为彩桦专辑的歌曲《原来我们都是幸福的》

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